Day 260.

 Yes. Today is May of 12. A very special and important day for us.
i uploaded parts of our picture that we have been through all this ups and downs.
All our hard and tough times, we manage to go over it.

 

woke up early and do this post. when i never had enough sleep de previous day.
this proves that how important May 12 is to me. anyway i also cant sleep la. lol!

Happy 6 years. all this 点点滴滴熬过来的六年.
though we didnt manage to tell each other this face to face, fully celebrate it
though we are doing diff things now, meeting diff ppl, no time for each other
but i hope u will always remember what we have been through all this 6 years.
no matter its happy memories or sad/bad memories. know our mistakes
and not to repeat it again. ok?
u are a not so romantic bad temper yet funny like to disturb me cum nice bf i had.
though until now we have some small arguments, but i still find it sweet.
cause all this arguments make me understand u more,
make me got more chance to get close and tok to u.
though i like dun care dun care like that one. =)
we will never no what will happen next time.
so let 老天decide all this bah. lets wait and see ok.
i believe no matter how much less time we spend together,
how much less time we communicate,
if u are mine, means u are mine. who also cant stop and cant destroy us right?
so for de time being, just stay happy. i dun wanna see ur sad and stress face.
i dun feel good when i see u like this also.
cheer up ok? i wanna see ur smile face everytime i meet u. =)

Day 259

One more day to May 12.

Day 236

你知道我一直都很想你吗?
你感觉得到吗?

Day 213

so u tell me 5years is nth to u.
its just a memories to u.

为什么你不尝试进入我的世界呢？
一定要我进入你的世界吗？
我的世界也没有不好啊.
为什么一定要我去找你而不是你来找我呢？

我们很爱对方 放不下对方 可是
我们就是有一个东西一抹一样
那就是，我们两个都不踏出那第一步.

我真的很不想踏出这第一步
因为我觉得你应该先走这一步.
如果你回来找我，我会心软的.

我只能在我的房间对着我的四面墙哭
什么都不能做.
我好想随便抱着任何一个人哭得痛痛快快
我却哭不出来. 到底这么了？

Day 199

Sometimes i wonder, when will i got my other half.
so wish to get marry.
so wanna get a rich husband.
but i cant let go, how am i going to get what i one.
when will i let go.

until now im still crying over u.
though not as much like last time.
but its still over u. silly me.
still find my life so suck and messy without u.
seriously without u, no one make decision for me le.
thats because without u making decision for me, i feel my life really got damaged.
7mths le. i really need to take 5years to recover everything?
i need to have a sucky life for 5years?

Day 184.

如果能重来一次，
我不愿让你一个人.

我最后一个奢求的可能
只求你有快乐人生.

想念你 不可能停止 只能期待末日
想念你 只愿你奔向 幸福的明日

Day 176

昨天我们都一起去考试
都一起不及格了. haha!

虽然我们没什么讲话
没什么看这对方
可是当你一离开train 要去找她的时候,
我真的很舍不得你
心有痛到.

每一次看到你 我的心就软了
不懂要这么跟你开口说话 这么看着你
没有看到你的时候 我很想骂你打你 很讨厌你

我也不知道我的心在想什么.
我只知道我还是想你的.

Day 173

人說 談感情 先認真的就不會贏
我們愛上的那個總是會比較愛自己

Day 172

I saw u that day.

U no, my heart is sour and pain?

I never wanna tok to u.

After some time never see u, I never wanna see u.

But I still saw u. I dunno how to react. Dunno what to do.

Dunno what to say. Dunno how to look at u.

Stoning at lounge. Colleagues no what happen and lai an Wei me.

Thanks guys.

Today is feb 14. 情人节.

U going to take off all de anything everything on Ur 身上 that is related to me.

Gave her everything u can.

Saying not to hurt another girl.

U no after I saw Ur text I feel like crying?

U no my heart damn pain?

U no how pissed off I'm?

Stop telling me that I'm changed.

U did change too ok.

And what attend wedding?! What u toking.

How old only. What wedding.

Stop all this things ok.

U wanna go get together with her, just go ahead.

Dun tell me all this.

Anyway, 我给你我的祝福 幸福. All de best to u and her.

Day 165

我们的爱犯了什么错
眼泪又在不停流
是不是谁给的不够
还是谁放的太多

我们的爱犯了什么错
不能向前 不能退后
谁应该原谅谁
变成爱的结果
这结果是谁的错

Day 162

没有你这么办
像我现在无法入眠
只要你在我身边.

Day 160.

U told me to go back to my normal life so i wont so xin ku.
U told me to go find my friends.
U told me to open my hands.
U told me we should not meet so much first.
U told me we should not contact at de moment.
U told me u hope i still will treat u as friend.
U told me u got soso much things to tell me but no use telling already.
And, u told me to find a boyfriend.
i find it so joke when u call me go find a boyfriend.

everything use say, i also can.
its like how i did that to u last time.
i still remember i cried and shout to u and tell u i dun love u anymore.
hang up ur call and never contact never meet u le.
i understand how u feel le. =)

i can tell u.. Sry, i still cant do it. so hard to open my hands.
so hard to get a boyfriend. so hard..

i hate u. hate u from falling in her.
hate u for not trying even more hard to get me back.
i always believe if u really love me soso much,
u will sacrifice anything and everything for me.
Thanks someone for telling me this.
but ask urself. did u?
what i heard from u is not like this. all i heard was 'excuses'
if u still love me that much, come back to me now. and throw her aside can?

i no i should not blame her.
but i just hate her. hate her that she got u.
cause i believe my love for u is much more and deeper then her.
and she just got u like this. so unfair to me. seriously.
call her no need act one nice person ok? so fake.
no need to tell me how good she is too. cause i still hate her.
u will never no how much i hate her.

i hate myself. hate myself that i am de one who ask for a breakup.
hate myself for not caring u that day.
hate myself for trusting u so much that u wont do that to me.
hate myself for giving u so much free time with ur friends and make u fall for her.
hate myself for being too boring. too quiet and not awesome enough for u.

removed pictures from fb, removed everything that u gave me at my room
will make me forget u?
i also dunno. seems like so hard to forget even if i removed everything from my room.
cause my brain my heart have not remove yet.

no matter what i do, where i go. work, sleep, walk, eat.
once i think of u and past. my eyes will get watery.
when can all this just stop?
until now i dun understand why i ended up like this.
i still cant get an answer and no one can answer me.
i thought im de happiest, go with simple life, blurr blurr let u take care of me de girl.
now? i feel so shitty. too much bad things happen to me.
i dunno what to do. really dunno.
hell headache.
life suck.

Day 158

U say road is I choose de. Ya! I choose. Me me me. I choose to break up with u. I choose not to care u that day. Idiot me. Road is I choose. What I got now I deserve it. It's my karma.

Maybe I should learn from u, get another half and forget de 5 years.

Seriously I dunno how did u forget everything

and happily living with her and get into her life do easily.

Can U tell me and teach me how u did it?

Broke up for 5 months le, I still at there think of u, think of de past,

never fail to forget u, keep cry like idiot, trying to make myself tired to sleep.

Can anybody tell me, how long I still need to cry? How long more I can open my hand?

5years, u can why I can't? Why I so stupid.

U are happy with her, yet I cry alone like idiot out there which no one care.

U said we are forever good friend. Please. Take away Ur forever.

There is nth forever.

Haix. I feel so idiot so stupid so dead so useless person now.

Bloody hell tired of my life. No more colors already. ='(

Day 156

我还以为我们会继续再走多五年的路.

交往了10年就可以结婚. 可是现在不是这样的.

看到好多朋友一个一个都结婚 拍结婚照

我都能感受到它们有多幸福快乐的. 但我的呢?

狠不得想快点找到我的幸福拍个结婚照

做世界上最幸福 最快乐 最漂亮的新娘. Haha!

我的小女人,

陪你经过你的风风雨雨 困难 问题 都帮你解决.

但是还是打动不了你.

为什么? 为什么她的小小的举动都会让你跑到她的身边去?

真不公平. 简简单单的我都会得到这样的悲剧.

Day 153

请看着我，说你还爱我.

我们都舍不得，我们会更好吗?

你的笑对我来说 真的很重要.

Day 147

我这样的爱你会不会好可怕?

Day 146

就让我忙到 连哭的时间都没有最好.

Day 144

我什么都没有了.
做人真难. 就不可以做一个简简单单过着平平凡凡生活的人吗?
为什么一定要做坏人.
对不起, 我不会做也不想做坏人.
坏人不好做.
我已经跌到很惨了. 真的够了.
不要在烦我, 我累惨了.
After a new year, thought things will go better.
But actually it never go better, and even worst.

Day 141.

Always there is someone beside me, tok to me, listen to me, share with me, accompany me.

Now, I need to get use to do things alone, everything alone.

我的累, 我的闷, 我能跟谁说?

你已经不在我身边了. 你知道我有多想你吗?

你知道我需要你在我的身边听我乱乱讲话吗?

我很累可是睡不着 不够睡. 为什么??

Haiz.

Day 101.

我想要的是这样的幸福.

Day 87.

Day 80.

Yesterday went to malaysia, shop, sing and watch movie.
me and yh sang Hurt So Bad.
i dun dare to look at him.. cause 我狠怕.
last song i sang is 如果这就是爱情,
almost tear out le.
but i still manage to sing all out with my awful voice..

好复杂的恋情 which i dunno how to explain.
i dunno what to do. so fml.
Seriously fml..
我很想逃.可是我能逃去哪里?
逃避能解决问题吗? haix..

Day 78.

how i wish i can dun care. or just mia for weeks.
what i do also not right at all.

things may not be de same like last time.
some things may be different.
u say i have changed.
yes. maybe i changed. yes, maybe things cannot be back like last time.
but my heart for u never change.
and its more then enough to cover everything.

Day 71.

如果我成全了你
如果我能祝福你
那不是我看清
是我证明
我爱你

我的心还是在你这边的.

the whole song is so awesome!

Day 66.

分开以后 每当想到你我就会低下头

Day 63.

不要走, 我舍不得.
我谁都不要, 只要你.
可是我们什么都不可以做.
只可以抱着你哭.
你回不来, 我进不去.

非要等到爱远走 分两头 才知道 多不舍你走
非要等到爱远走 分两头 才知道 你我都怕寂寞

对不起, 我为难了你.

Day 60.

两个月了...

The hardest thing in love is letting go,
Letting go the one you love.

Surprised that i never post day 54?
yupe. because i forget.. (how can i forget?!)
its because i went out with him..
after that went to kbox and find my friends..

wait for de next awesome post bah. =)

Day 53.

Picture took at Singapore Indoor Stadium.
where we went to watch SHINee's Concert.
and thats de last pic we took together...

Sometimes words aren't enough to describe how I feel about you... about us.

Day 52.

get to listen to this song at radio when i was working in Fish and Co.
i dunno who de hell is this guy. i dun even no his mv so suck.
and he is not famous at all.
but one thing, his song is awesome~

Out of all the people in this world, I still want you.
Saranghamnida.

Day 51..

自從你離開了我變得很軟弱
你的影子在每一個角落
好像是在提醒著我
少了你的陪伴我現在有多寂寞

Day 50..

another stupid mv.
with awesome lyrics..

你好吗?
tml i got no work.. can rest rest.
today so tired.
yesterday late reach home and today got jap lesson. omg..
but still ok. i got afternoon nap.
with work, time pass real fast..

hope u are fine with ur homework too.
presentation coming up, 要加油! =)

Day 49.

Recently busy with my work..
working night shift de.
when i wake up, u are at sch or with ur friends.
when i end work, u tired and fall asleep le.
so doesnt have much time to tok to u..
but sometimes when i end work,
i still receive ur msg which makes me feel so nice and happy.
and when i reach home, u are still online..
i still have time to chat abit abit with u..

even though de abit doesnt help much, but im still happy. =)

even though ur time and my time is abit different now,
but still hope i can catch up abit of ur something.
cause i still care. 还很想你.

Hurt So Bad this song, really very nice.
its like another 過火 song.
every single sentence is how i feel like telling u..
have to thanks yh for singing that song that day.

Day 48.

did u find this song so familiar?
the music is from 为什么相爱的人不能够在一起.

very nice song that i heard from kbox..
爱真的没那么简单,
if it is so easy, i already got u back le..

你是否听到我心中那个小小的秘密?

Day 47.

Baby I love you so much..
你走了我的心在淌血...
你知道吗?

Day 46.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO UU!!

祝你生日快乐~

this cow thingy place at my room for quite a long time le.
thats why so dusty now.
anyway, its to remind me that ur bday is coming,
and i gonna prepare something awesome for u. =)

hope this year de things that i prepared is awesome enough.

我要跟你讲，你 不管发生什么事， 一定要过的快快乐乐的。好吗？
你开心就是我开心。有什么事，都可以找我聊。 =)

Day 45.

i 越来越想 this 4 little cutie and the rest of them.
how are they doing?
did they miss me? =(

Day 44.

我们的爱, 过了就不在回来.
直到现在我还在默默的等待.

Day 43.

我的彩虹不见了.
真的不见了.
找不回来了.

Day 42.

Without words things just happened like this.
without words love leaves and threw me away.
without words my tears fell down
without words my heart breaks

Without words love came.
without words love left.
like a fever i had before.

My heart was surprised to leave you without any preparation.

Day 41.

Awesome song from handsome guy Jang Geun Suk

What should i do?
I can do nothing.
Really nothing.

I cry out to you
but you cant hear me because
I am only shouting in my heart.

Day 40.

Remember this?
u put it on for me and it is still on my neck.
The first diamond that u bought it for me.
using up all ur savings to get it for me.

i still remember i told u i one a 1carat ring when u propose to me.
and u told me back that u will slowly buy a bit by bit
for all special days and accumulate
until de last diamond to make it 1carat to propose to me.

你还记得吗?

Now, whats going on?
What's happening?

Day 39.

Have to inability to accept all this.
Should i love u or hate u?
I think it is better to remain silent.

Day 38.

Stupid MV.
Nice Lyrics.

我想要的不只是sorry.

Day 37.

Both is ur fav.
when we got craving to eat sushi
we will just go to Sakae Sushi
and u can just order nonstop with this 2 items.

i still remember there is one time
u order 4 plate of Tako. 1plate with 2 Tako inside.
4 plate is 8 Tako.
de waitress serve wrongly to other table.
de person who is sitting at de table just stun there.
thinking did he order so much Tako?!
after that u told de waitress it is urs.
de person just stare at u. lol.

really miss those times.
find one day we go makan again! =)

Day 36.

我真的很怕安静.
very scare to sleep.
because everytime i sleep, no one is beside me.
i even need to cover my ears to sleep
because my room is dark and quiet.
it will make me think alot of things and cry again.
thats why i always keep myself awake. and lack of sleep.
i seriously cannot tahan de quietness every night.

我不想怕安静可以吗.

你以经不怕安静了.

Day 35.

我在等一个人
在等我的永恒
那就是你
告诉我 爱不单行 别害怕.

Day 34.

我的另一半可以回来吗？
我的生活 只差你就美满。

Day 33.

我呼吸的时候会痛
想见你不能见最痛

我发誓不在说慌了
多爱你就会抱你多紧的
我的微笑都假了
灵魂像飘浮着
你在就好了

我发誓不让你等候
陪你做想做的无论什么
我越来越像贝壳
怕心被人触碰
你回来那就好了

能重来那就好了

Everyday repeat & repeat this song and listen before i could go to bed.

Day 32.

香水

i think our relationship is like ur Perfumes.
i bought u one Giorgo Armani de.
u slowly use it for a very long time.
now left half bottle.

After back from Taiwan, u bought urself a CK Free For Men.
and u are using it now. and never touch de Giorgo Armani le.

its like using de Giorgo Armani until sian liao.
wanna change diff but also nice so got urself a CK.
Understand?

i feel that im not into ur world le.
i feel that we have distance already.
i dunno whats ur world is now.
drink? town? with ur group of friends? and her?
i dun even dare or allow to step into ur world.

anyone that is close to u knows that u are closer with friends then gf.
which i dun mind at all.
sometimes i wish that i can throw away de position of gf
and be ur very good friend.
so that u will be nice and good like how u treat ur friends too.

am i ur good friend now?
why u still treat me so diff from ur friends?
because u use to treat me like this?
because im not ur friend?
because ur friends and me is 2 diff world?
or because she is over there?

how can i get into ur world again?
should i learn how to drink and bring u go town everyday
so that i can get into ur world?
or how can we get back to our world that we use to be?

i never dun wanna tok to u in msn.
lazy to say out why.
cause im repeating my words and sentences again.

i am so lost. because im alone in my own world. ='(

Day 31.

以前说的不是这种以后.

以前也要的不是这种以后.

Day 30.

一个月了，时间过的好快。
以前，你用一个月的时间来放下这段恋情。
而现在的我，已经一个月过了我还放不下你。
还很舍不得你。还很需要你。
因为我一直把你排在第一位。
突然间发生怎样的事，我真的受不了。
每天还在哭哭啼啼的想想想。
我到底怎么了？
我该怎么办？
谁可以告诉我。
我快要累死了。好想死了算了。不用想那么多。
可是我没那么傻。

世界上最遥远的距离，是你... 陪着我的时候想着她.
最痛的距離,是你不在身邊卻在我的心裡。

我觉得你比以前快乐了. 你也不怕安静了。
你有一群朋友和她在你的身边。
你看着她就行了。不用一直看你的电话。
我说的对吧。

五年，就这样完了吗？

Day 29.

你的温柔 像一把刀 刺进我的胸口.



我知道, 你不会的.

Day 28.

你看的见我的笑 多受伤吗?

Day 27.

你还记得吗？

Day 26.

Hows ur chalet? fun bah.
always wanted to whatsapp u but 没有勇气 to whatsapp u.
cause i no either is u dun reply me or u will take very long time to reply me.
and i have to wait and wait.
which makes me think that u have so much fun over there until reply me also so hard.
and when u are with me, ur phone ring u can just reply immediately.
so i tell myself not to whatsapp u, not to think so much.
just let u have fun. most important is that u are happy. =)

Day 25.

我卻无法把你忘了。

Day 24.

我的心比第一天还来的痛。
因为我知道你一天比一天的关心和但心她了。
你管都不管我了。

我不知道我该恨谁。
恨她也不对。
我好想恨你，可是我又舍不得恨你。
很生气，很不甘愿，好想找人发泄可是不知道找谁好。

我活该，我恨我自己我太过爱你。
恨我自己以前这样对你。
活该有着样的下场。

为什么！为什么！！ ='(

痛到快死了。

Anyway, im sure u will njoy ur 3d2n chalet so much de.

Day 23.

Kinda angry and pissed off.

Anyway, yesterday's dinner is awesome ttm!
because i get to see all of them yesterday which i miss them so muchie~
when i step into de house door, de kids there just call me jiejie..
my heart started to melt already.. so happy and upset at de same time.
so happy to see de kids, ur aunty uncle, ur brothers, ur da jie jie fu & jiahui jiayi.

its nice looking at them learning things from mama
playing ipad, watching johnny english,
toking to de kids, playing with each other,
and drink de ginseng tea. So re nao.

i never treasure before.
and regret after.

and de food is still so awesome.
miss ur aunty's cooking. =)
awesome food with awesome ppl = Best!

will there be next time? Nobody knows, even me.

Day 22.

you & ur nice pose..

爱太痛了.

Day 21.

3weeks le, time pass so fast. still heart pain ever.
u told me u never read de offline msg that i send u.
and yesterday i send it to u online.
after u read it, how do u feel?
nth? or feelings that dunno how to explain it out?
or dun wanna tell me?

hope those words can touched u abit.



失去了你, 我才知道我没什么朋友.
你对我来说真的很重要.

Day 20.

Key chain that u bought it at Wallaby..
Lazy one is u. Naughty one is me.
but ended up u tell me i should that de Lazy one.
and because this chain is heavy,
so both is with me now.
hanging along with my house key.

Day 19.

heart getting more and more pain.
uncountable knifes, needles, broken glasses stuck in my heart.
mood getting more and more bad.
no one dare to tok to me.
face getting more and more shag.
dark circles getting deeper.

lack of sleep and eat.
which gives me alot of time and i dunno what can i do.



u & ur fav Show.

u are my 药.

Day 18.

u, me & Taipei 101.

remember? u taught me how to take this pic.
following de couple that took de same angle of de pic behind us.

ok, i have a fat face.

Day 17.

did u receive ur offline msg from me in msn?
i did wrote alot to u telling u how i feel all this days..
i hope u did receive it.

All the best in ur Management today!
after that u wont have stress word in ur mind already. =)



Missya so much.

Day 16.

Miss all the oily and unhealthy food that u cooked for me.

Day 15.

i miss having Mc Breakfast with u..

Still have chance to eat breakfast with u?

i hope.
i wish.
i want.

Day 14.

This song is for u..

It's always de best if everyday is like yesterday night.
Please dun leave me.

Day 13.

我很想你。
我只要你。
我需要你。
可以回来吗？

如果可以，我希望时间能回到原点。

Day 12.

i miss all of them, alot.

Day 11.

The last pic that we took it together..

Day 10.

CupCorn use to be our fav in movies.
but price went up. so never get to eat it already..

Day 9.

This is what u bought for me at Taiwan.

Day 8.

Monday, I'm waiting
Tuesday, I'm still waiting to see
see.. see... if you are fine
Wednesday, you're still not here
Neither in the morning nor later
Thursday is also empty
Friday, Saturday or Sunday
None of the day that i dun miss you
None of the day that you will come back
to be in our old days

The day that i met you
The day that i was close to you
The day that we held hands
The day that i loved you
The day that i spoke to you
The day that you listened to me
How long it will be like this? i dun know.
How many months or years?
How many billions of our past memory?

I never dun miss you
I'm Sorry.

Day 7.

0512 is our number. Our date.

Day 6.

Nobody knows what this means. Only you and me..

Day 5.

Lin Yu Zhong - Xuan Lu

Once u hold my hand so tight, look at me, and sang to me so seriously at kbox.

Day 4.

Stage reminds me of you.

Day 3.

Esplanade is forever our place.







love Esplanade alot.

Day 2.

this mv, this song, is ur current fav. Good Things.

this song, at ur house when we are going out,
im surprised that u learn this song so fast.
u told me that because u are learning this song
and ur neighbour make noise at midnight,
u still thought ur neighbour make noise
cause u sing too loud when u are learning.

and this is de last song that u sang to me.
are u really singing this to me?

Met you yesterday after things happen.
when u are on the way, i told them im scare..
yes. im scare. and i miss u alot.
but i dunno how to look directly at ur eyes.
when u are here, i try act like im alright.
but after i saw u, im angry & upset.
all our memories just come back to my mind when we watch Cars2.
think and think, keep tell myself not to stand close to u,
cannot cry in front of u, end up i fall asleep inside. haha.

after i reached home, i just let go and cried for hours.
early this morning wake up cried for hours again..
after things happen, this is de day that i tear so much so much.

even though i never look at u much.
but i still really do miss u..
Nice song from u - Good Things.

不要哭 至少你和我记得很清楚
爱 是为彼此祝福

Dun cry, at least you and me remember it very clearly
Love, is giving blessings to each other.

i cannot dun cry, but i will remember it very clearly
i love u, and i will give u all my blessings. =)

Day 1.

Red Integra makes me think of you.
Below office has a Black Integra.
Everytime i saw Integra, it would be you.

No.

What did i do wrong?
and this is what i get in return?
what stupid shit is this seriously.

Balancing

Recently u have been busy with ur assignment, ur exam.
While im busy with nth. im jobless. no income. bored at home.

i didnt blame u that u keep stick with ur friends.
cause friends are more important to u.
but u have to remember u still have another one beside u.
which u have forgotten.

i dun wanna no whats wrong with us.
i just wanna both of us happy.
are you really happy with the another one that is beside u?
i think with ur friends u are more happy bah.

Please balance everything properly.

u answered their call. but please answer mine too.
u sms them, reply their every msg. but mine? none.
ur phone is always silent when u are with them.
but not mine.

i tried not to disturb u already.
i really hate all this. Please put a full stop in there.

这一个星期我过的好心苦.
我到底这么了...

你的脾气我好难聊解.. =(

Forgotten.

还记得我是你的谁吗？
感觉上好像你忘了我是你的谁了。